3月12日每日双语笑话

  pianocao ·  2008-03-12 10:29  ·  57167 次点击
Jackfeelloffhisbicycleandgothurt.Abeautifulyoungnurseaskedhimtofillforms.Jackfinishedthemandgavethemback."Anythingelse?"Thenurseasked."Yes,"Jackthinksforawhileandsaid,"I'mabachelor."杰克骑车摔伤,得住院治疗.一位年轻美貌的护士拿着表格让填.仞杰克填好递上表格"还有什么漏填的?"护士问."有!"杰克想了想说,"我是个单身汉."
2.
Father:Ipromisedtobuyyouacarifyoupassedyourexamination,andyouhavefailed.Whatwereyoudoinglastterm?
父亲:我曾向你许诺,如果你考试及格就给你买俩小汽车,可你却未能做到。你上学期一直在干什么呀?
Son:Iwaslearningtodriveacar.
儿子:我在学开汽车。
3.
GoodNewsAndBadNews
"There'sgoodnewsandbadnews,"thedivorcelawyertoldhisclient.
"Icouldsureusesomegoodnews,"sighedtheclient."What'sit?"
"Yourwifeisn'tdemandingthatyourfutureinheritancesbeincludedinthesettlement."
"Andthebadnews?"
"Afterthedivorce,she'smarryingyourfather."
好消息和坏消息
“有好消息,也有坏消息,”离婚律师告诉他的当事人。
“我总能听到一些好消息吧,”当事人叹了口气说,“是什么好消息?”
“你妻子没有要求将你未来的继承财产也划入裁决的范围。”
“那么坏消息呢?”
“离婚以后,她将与你父亲结婚。”
4.
FirstFlight第一次坐飞机
Mr.Johnsonhadneverbeenupinanaerophanebeforeandhehadreadalotaboutairaccidents,soonedaywhenafriendofferedtotakehimforarideinhisownsmallphane,Mr.Johnsonwasveryworriedaboutaccepting.Finally,however,hisfriendpersuadedhimthatitwasverysafe,andMr.Johnsonboardedtheplane.
约翰逊先生从前未乘过飞机,他读过许多关于飞行事故的报道。所以,有一天一位朋友邀请他乘自己的小飞机飞行时,约翰逊先生非常担心,不敢接受。不过,由于朋友不断保证说飞行是很安全的,约翰逊先生终于被说服了,登上了飞机。
Hisfriendstartedtheengineandbegantotaxiontotherunwayoftheairport.Mr.Johnsonhadheardthatthemostdangerouspartofaflightwerethetake-offandthelanding,sohewasextremelyfrightenedandclosedhiseyes.
他的朋友启动引擎开始在机场跑道上滑行。约翰逊先生听说飞行中最危险的是起飞与降落,所以他吓得紧闭双眼。
Afteraminuteortwoheopenedthemagain,lookedoutofthewindowoftheplane,andsaidtohisfriend,"Lookatthosepeopledownthere.Theylookassmallasants,don'tthey?"
过了一两分钟,他睁开双眼朝窗外望去,接着对朋友说道:“看下面那些人,他们看起来就象蚂蚁一样小,是不是?”
"Thoseareants,"answeredhisfriend."We'restillontheground."“那些就是蚂蚁,”他的朋友答道,“我们还在地面上。”

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